Ye Olde Different Sixty-Seven

I’ve thrown all sorts of balls—most recently jugging balls into the air. I once threw a tomato at a teacher for charity—I had to pay $5.00 and missed him by a mile. I’ve thrown a temper tantrum or two. And I’ve thrown a couple of dirty looks in my time. I’ve never thrown an axe—until today. The words axe and throwing don’t normally fit into the same sentence. But there I was at ‘Ye Olde Axe Throwing’ facility being instructed on the art of tossing axes.
I joked with Ella—yesterday paintball and today axe throwing so what weapon should I expect for tomorrow. She told me there was no weapon but we could expect shooting. I tried to get her to tell me what that meant. But she wouldn’t. Ella was consistent in keeping these things from me. Tomorrow I’d find out. Today I had to focus on the axe in my hand.
They weren’t your typical chopping wood type of axes. These were smaller, thinner and specifically especially designed for throwing. Okay, who would think that anybody would be designing axes to be thrown? They were black, all metal, thin and surprisingly light. Not surprisingly they were sharp to the touch.
Our instructor was a big, burly man with a thick beard and was dressed in a red flannel shirt. He was, basically, a lumberjack. Hello Paul Bunyan! That was reassuring because if anybody would know about throwing axes, it should be a lumberjack.
On the back wall were the targets—which were cross-section cuts of logs. That seemed as fitting as the instructor being a lumberjack. He showed us how it was done by tossing three axes. Each went into the target with a solid thump. He made it seem easy. It wasn’t.
My first three tosses didn’t work. The first one didn’t even come close to hitting the target but smashed against the wall. The next two wobbled and hit it sideways. Instead of a thump there was a thud followed by a clank as they hit the floor. Ella wasn’t any better with her throws. We got a few more instructions—“throw it, don’t aim it”—we were ready again.
I’d like to tell you that the next three all went straight into the target—dead centre. But I’d be lying. It wasn’t until eight shots later that I got one to stick. It was the side of the target—with the back of the axe—which was also sharp…but it stayed.
I have to admit that it did look pretty cool. And I did like the fact that there was minimal risk, no heights, no snakes, and no crowd to witness it all. I wasn’t good at it but axe throwing was actually fun.
I only have one question: what did Ella mean that tomorrow would have shooting but no weapons? Please if anybody is reading this and has any idea could you message or tweet!


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